Because I Can

It's Christmas Eve. We've had a busy day. I fed 4 single soldiers and our family lunch, made Gingerbread Men and Oatmeal Chocolate Chip cookies, then followed up by feeding the same individuals Nacho's and Burritos for Dinner. I've still got "WORK" to do after my sweet little wee man gets to bed.

It's 8:56 p.m. I'm sitting on my bed and it just hit me that I miss my mamma and daddy something bad. I was FINALLY able to talk with them via Skype today and it was nice to hear that they are excited about celebrating Christmas in the ATL with my Aunts and Uncles. I wish I was there BUT in the same breath I know that my Heavenly Father has a reason for me staying here in Germany for the holidays. Wes and I have been given the opportunity to share with 4 soldiers who were unable to be with their families. I've said it before and I'll say it again; any time the Lord allows us to bless others we are more blessed in return.

I'm going to shower and crawl into my new jammies that my husband bought to follow the tradition my mom and Dad started when I was 2 years old. I've always opened my jammies on Christmas Eve and Wesley knew how important it was for me. Clark and Wes got new jammies too!

Merry CHRISTmas my friends!

Merry Christmas to You and Yours!

Scattered......But Relaxed

Hi Friends!
Breezy, Clark and I have been in the Alps since Monday and are enjoying some much needed and deserved R & R. Believe it or not, its 11:30 a.m. and I'm sitting here freshly showered and back in my jammies. We rented an apartment with an amazing view in a quaint little town in the middle of nowhere. It's just what we needed and will plan to come back next year with our family of 4 :-) to celebrate Christmas UNLESS we are finally settled in our new home back in the US of A.

Speaking of family of 4, today I am proud to say that today I have made it to 19 weeks. I have been free of bleeding or any other complications for nearly 3 weeks. I had an appointment last week and the Dr. was thrilled to see me. He said he had missed our weekly/daily visits with one another. My blood pressure is still running a little low but with a little nap midday I seem to be shoveling along! We were pretty positive that the baby was a boy but the little boy part seem to either be hidden or we're having a little girl. We'll see at our next appointment in the New Year.

I've actually had time to just sit and read, something I never get to do but thoroughly enjoy. I started this book while I was in the hospital back in November but have not had a moment to sit and read anymore since then. I have been blessed beyond measures from reading the words of Marilynn Blackaby. If you are a "home maker" like I am then you too will be blessed by this reading. I'm not sure if you can get it at L*f*Way but I know its available from several sites on the web. We're looking forward to a couple of single soldiers joining us tomorrow to celebrate the Christmas. They were unable to return home to the families so we've invited them to join us here in the Alps. They will be a lot of fun to have here especially on Christmas Day. We've been telling Clark that we're having a birthday party for Jesus so he insisted we make Him a Chocolate Cake.

I'll be back in a day or two with photos I hope. Vacation Day #3 and I have yet to take any photos. I'll be better I promise!

Behold, Behold, I Stand at the door and Knock, Knock, Knock

Me: And who might be knocking?
Person/Thing at My Door: Oh....It's just me Mr. Flu
Me: We'll you are not welcome in my home
Mr. Flu: Well, I'm comin' in anyways. Like it or not!

despite not wanting to answer, Mr. Flu has just barged right in and I have had the flu not once but twice in less than 2 weeks. The first round hit Turkey Day evening and lasted for 4 days. This time it hit me on Saturday night and hit FULL FORCE within about 12 hours. I went to the clinic yesterday because I just couldn't stand the sore throat anymore and on top of the flu I also have strep. I hate those yucky throat swabs and giving a nice sample of my blood, but thankfully b/c I was a willing participant I was given some Penicillin that has made me feel somewhat better today.

I have told Wes over and over again in the last 2 weeks that the last 7 weeks of my life have been pure he**. Between 2 hospital stays, 5 weeks of bed rest, the flu twice, and just being outright homesick, I'm ready for a break. My friends keep reminding me that I MUST rest and find my perseverance and strength in my Lord. I;m doing my very best...Promise!

Friends, its in times like this when I become so weary that I totally begin to question my own faith. I know that the nasty/ugly things I am feeling are not those of those of the ONE who Cherish me, but of the one who despises the great things that are also happening in the midst of what seems like a disaster to me. I know that God brought my family to Germany for a reason 3 1/2 years ago. I know that we extended to stay here for another year for a reason. I know that I was blessed with the REC Position at our chapel for a reason within 1 week of returning. I know that this sweet little boy growing inside of my belly and the pregnancy complications are no surprise to my Lord. More importantly, I know that this worn out, ready to call it quits feeling is NOT ok. I can feel that I am being refreshed slowly but surely and finding that as always my Lord wants ALL of me even the minute pieces that I don't think are important enough to lay at his feet.

Leaning on the Everlasting Arms

What a fellowship, what a joy divine,
leaning on the everlasting arms;
what a blessedness, what a peace is mine,
leaning on the everlasting arms.

Refrain:
Leaning, leaning,
safe and secure from all alarms;
leaning, leaning,
leaning on the everlasting arms.

O how sweet to walk in this pilgrim way,
leaning on the everlasting arms;
O how bright the path grows from day to day,
leaning on the everlasting arms.
(Refrain)

What have I to dread, what have I to fear,
leaning on the everlasting arms?
I have blessed peace with my Lord so near,
leaning on the everlasting arms.
(Refrain)

My Boys!
Just a little sneak peek at our Christmas Photos :-)

Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart

My dear friends;

I know it seems like every time I come here to blog I have been MIA for some reason. For that I apologize...again. In the last week I have had a lot to process and a lot of decisions to make and that includes making a lot more time for those people that are important in my life. The REC/Program's ministry has kept me so busy that in many ways I have been negligent of many of the more important things. I have always said if and when I ever begin to put Ministry/my work above my "family" someone PLEASE be bold enough to tell me. We all need a reality check from time to time from the inside out.

Once again. I was in the hospital for 4 more days from Friday-Monday with MORE pregnancy complications. I believe my body is finally on the mends now and we are on the way to being able to carry this baby until full term. On November 8th during routine ultrasound the OBGYN discovered a large hematoma (about 12 or 13 cm by about 5 or 6 cm) that had attached itself to the bottom of my uterus. I was assured that it would not harm the baby but that it could become a free bleeder of old blood....we'll it did. I started bleeding Monday the 16th and bleed for exactly 7 days. The hospital/bed rest did help the mass to shrink greatly in size but when we measured yesterday it was still about 5 cm by 2 cm. I understand that this shrinking process could happen quickly or it may bleed more, or it may just remain until the baby is born.

On another note, when I was first admitted on the 28th of October for bleeding we never really got any clear answers. We knew that there were 2 cyst/sac like obstructions that were attached to my placenta, and one of them ruptured and the 2nd one reabsorbed itself...THANK GOODNESS. After seeing a specialist yesterday and spending close to 2 hours with him, he is more than positive that the fluid filled sacs were more than likely baby's B and C. When he told me that I almost fell off the ultrasound table. I can't even begin to imagine what I would do with TRIPLETS.

We were very impressed with Dr. Reu and he has said that since I am considered to be very high risk at this time (between the bleeding's and my blood pressure)he would consider be seeing him through the remaining 5 1/2 months. Wes and I are weighing our options and will make a decision in the next few days.

BUT....Today I am thankful for a few things and I wanted to share that with you :
* Breezy, Clark and I are spending this Thanksgiving together in OUR home not in different countries.
* Breezy made it home from playing war safely and on time. God is our Strong Tower.
* Clark has been close to sickness free for almost one year
* I am almost back to healthy and praising God for being my Great Physician.
* I am carrying a healthy baby BOY that we will call John Carsen or Carsen Lee.
* Our families that are back in the South :-) who will be eating Cajun Fried Turkey without me today.
* For serving in a ministry that is growing in amazing new directions
* Lastly, for my friends who have become my strength since I've not had very much of my own.

Happy Turkey Day Yall! Enjoy your families and friends as you celebrate the Great Things that God is doing and will continue to do in your lives!

Lots of Love from Germany!