"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, PATIENCE, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and seld-control." Galations 5:22 Lately, I have been pondering the fact that most of the fruits that I am suppose to possess, and have possessed at one time have SLOWLY withered away. It's my own fault, there is no one else to blame. I believe that I have just become so content with my life situation that I have allowed those fruits that are so vitally important to my relationship with Christ to surely slip right out from under me. I can make excuses over and over again, but are they reasonable, or are they just lame, and due to my laziness. Love is not a problem for me at all, but do I love the right things? Am I showing love to those who need it the most, or have I become somewhat of a hateful, ungreatful person? I have joy unspeakable right now, or atleast I feel like I do, but is the joy that I am experiencing TRUE joy? Peace, I'm not really sure that I can say i've come face to face with peace lately. In this crazy little life of mine over the last 7 months, I don't think I've had a peaceful moment. I am lacking patience greatly. Should I ask for more? I know that I am going to need patience like never before once Wesley leaves for Germany and the baby arrives, but what should I do about it now? Do I ask the Father to give me more, or is that just selfishly asking? I'm a kind person, or most people would say that I am, but yes like most I do have HORRIBLE mood swings from time to time, and I can be very hateful when I'm in one of my moods. Goodness, yes I've experience goodness ALOT lately, but have I shown goodness towards others is the real question? Have I allowed other to see that I am truly greatful for the things that they have done for me, especially Wesley and my mom and dad? Lastly, but probably the best of them all self-control...believe it or not I can give a positive on this one. I can truthfully say that self-control is something I have been working hard at over the last 7 months. But the real question is why? Why did I allow my fruits to get away from me? Contentment? Discontentment? Laziness? There could be a world of reasons, but really I dont even know where to begin to look for the answers. I've spent alot of time thinking today, and over the next few weeks, unless the Father sends me in another direction I am going to be searching the scriptures and studying each piece of this verse with a fine tooth comb. I've got alot of work to do, I know this for sure. I need it though. I've come to a dry point, and until I can get my fruits back in order, it will remain that way. Enough Said. Point Taken! I think I just answered alot of my own questions.
